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Walking on the beach this morning, it occurred to me, as transient and ever changing as the ocean is, it is also incredibly permanent. Living as I do in a constant state of flux, it provides a restorative underpinning to see that paradox is the essence of all things. The waves may flow in and slide out, but the fabric of the sea remains intact.
Just so, my life continues to ebb and flow in new patterns and combinations; but at my essence I am the newborn soul arriving 45 years ago to have this experience.
Are you the kayak, the paddle or the paddler?
An image came to me while I was in yoga the other day of a kayak and it explained why some business models can get too complicated for small business owners.
Before I go any further, think for a minute… which would you prefer to be? The Kayak? The Paddle? The Paddler? Don’t think too hard on this, go with your gut.
Ok, here is why this is important.
The Kayak is your platform. It is the vehicle that gets you moving. In a business model, it is the services or products, whatever it is that delivers value and drives revenue.
The Paddle is your locomotion. It is the propeller that drives you forward. Or think of it as sales, marketing, networking, word of mouth, distribution….whatever the mechanisms are that get your kayak into market.
The Paddler is, of course, you. It is the leadership, the decision maker, the strategist.
What happens for most small businesses is that they are trying to be all three all the time.
I started documenting this list last year and thought this would be an interesting annual exercise, so here goes for Y2011.
As I explained a year ago, I subscribe to Seth Godin’s Blog. If you don’t know Seth yet, and you are a marketer in any form, you really should become familiar with his writings. One of Seth’s ideas that has really sunk in for me is when he talks about “Just Ship It”. Meaning actually completing a project and letting it out into the world, even if it isn’t exactly perfect. I like Seth’s idea of reviewing the previous year from a task completion perspective, sometimes actual accomplishments fly by without any recognition.
Here is my 2011 “Shipping Report”, in no particular order:
- Home renovations: new heat & air, new plumbing, new roof, new bathroom, updated kitchen, refinished wood floors, updated lights & fans, new paint inside & out – 3 months of living out of a suitcase & crashing at friend’s houses, I have very kind friends.
- Yoga Teacher Training Weekend – I miss my yoga teacher & mentor- Carson Eiferd who is living in California now.
- Delivered consulting engagement to Smart Online to organize their sales message, processes and deliverables to the nonprofit sector – I recognized I have a unique perspective on audiences that most technologists do not have.
- Heart & Soul internet radio interview, very cool process to be interviewed and my ideas (and Heartmath’s) captured in perpetuity! Read my original blog post here.
- Ski trip at Snowshoe – I realized I do not like skiing at all. I did enjoy lazing around and catching up on my reading once I gave up on that whole ski thing.
- Co-delivered the Virtual Vitality Showcase, a 1-day online webinar with talented wellness resources. My co-collaborator in crime – Denise Starrett is AWESOME!
- Exhibited and attended NTEN’s NTC2011: a conference in Washington DC for Nonprofit Technology Professionals. Met with American Heart Association - very smart & mobile saavy team of folks.
- Initiated, crafted and managed project for mobile application for Susie’s Law to help supporters take action for animals.
- Crafted mobile application requirements for Bethesda Lutheran Communities for annual fundraising campaign.
- Attended the Humane Society’s Taking Action for Animals Conference in Washington, DC. Met lots of very passionate animal advocates, including Mercy for Animals a gutsy organization that tackled McDonalds’ egg supplier and got results!
- Crafted and presented Mobile ROI webinar to help nonprofits justify investment in mobile applications. Great attendance & interest in the subject.
- Attended NC Tech for Good Conference, learned all about video and how the NC Museum of Life & Science in Durham was leveraging social media.
- Family Wedding & Reunion at the Outer Banks, NC over Memorial Day. A happy/sad event, as we had lost my father four days before the wedding. RIP Gabriel E. Maravetz.
- Attended NC Association of Fundraising Professionals Annual Conference. Participated in lively discussion about mobile fundraising.
- Yoga Retreat in Wilmington, ahhh relaxation & camaraderie with my fellow yogis.
- Co-launched The M Gen, LLC with my business partner – Tonia Zampieri- a strategic consulting firm focused on introducing mobile to nonprofits.
- Attended the NC Center for Nonprofits Annual Conference, assisted in mobile presentation. Have you checked your website on mobile yet? Where is your donation button?
- Volunteered at Digital East in Washington DC. Lots of commute time in Virginia = high stress.
- Participated on experts panel for WALDE, sharing my perspective on mobile technology innovations for fundraising. Really amazing people in Wisconsin.
- Attended Internet Summit 2011 in Raleigh, NC. Mobile is a disruptive force to be reckoned with now.
- Attended Rural Coalition Annual Conference and Gala, organized mobile application requirements for RC. Collaborated w. National Crop Insurance Services & USDA.
- Reconnected with my Pilates teaching as I began to teach in Evolve Movement‘s new North Raleigh studio. Very lovely clients.
Well, there are still 3 weeks in 2011 so this may be a bit premature to publish, but this is also a winding down time of year, as people focus more on celebration than undertaking huge new efforts. But perhaps I will find to my happy surprise that more big wins(or at least shipping projects) await me as 2011 winds down. If so, I will update 
Otherwise described as “pay attention”.
Sometimes i can get so caught up in the busyiness of doing for the sake of doing, I forget how important the why is.
This week, it took a nip on the lip to recalibrate my doing into being.
Faced with probably the smallest of flesh wounds it would require to get my attention, I was forced to look within and decide how important my current project and efforts are to me and my future.
I had to make a decision that my face marred with a fat lip and stitches would not deter me from flying to Wisconsin and participating on a panel to speak on the value of mobile technology in fundraising. It could not prevent me from fulfilling a commitment to a wonderful client and new friend. And it would not stop the progress of the efforts my business partner is so diligently putting forth. I would not be deterred from making new connections even if i wasn’t at my prettiest or perhaps would not make my best first impressions ever.
My dog taking a small chunk out of my lip 12 hours before I needed to board a flight is not the ideal way to get a wake up call, but it was enough to remind me of what is important and why I need to have faith, hold the vision and the why as we strike out in this new adventure.
I have lots of ideas, all day long thoughts pop into my head, good ideas, bad ideas, ideas that are embarrassingly stupid, ideas that need to be left in the genie’s bottle and once in awhile, ideas that you know just need a little polish to become gems. The difference between all these ideas is that some are turned into action and others are left to float away into the ether.
The deciding factor? Filtering these ideas through my hard earned wisdom and the wisdom of my network. Exploring which of these multitudes of ideas will work and which will take me off target. Which ideas will take way too long to implement and which ones are Eureka! moments, gifts from the heavens? There are no guarantees, but self-trust, personal awareness and very candid friends go a long way in this filtering process.
I’ve been thinking alot about ideas and inventions because I just left a job where they are very concerned about the creation of ideas, claiming those ideas and protecting those ideas from others. The extreme opposite of open source or the very open principles of social media. In today’s world of Wiki and interconnectedness; pretty much a lost cause, but I digress.
When you work for someone else, in an ideal world, they have hired you for both your brilliant ideas and the accumulated wisdom to filter through those ideas. And for as long as that works well, you feel energized and excited to see your ideas come to fruition and deliver results. Clearly you are trading your ideas for resources that you do not have yourself, or you would do it yourself; maybe those resources are time, skills, money, energy or focus. You are trading your ideas for compensation instead.
The difficulty lies when your wisdom is no longer valued. While your ideas might still be harvested, your insight isn’t applied. You know that is the time to move on.
But ownership of those ideas? I would argue that once wisdom has left the building, ideas left behind have a very limited shelf-life. And as goes the wisdom, so goes the new ideas, which may look similar to those old gems, but are being created in the next moment, as with new experiences and insights come new inventions.
I didn’t say bad or worse, but if I were completely honest, I wouldn’t say better either. In one regard, I am grateful for a free 3-day weekend at home, a quiet respite from a flurry of travel for the past month. In the other regard, I am feeling a little melancholy for the end to a family tradition; you see for the past eight years my family has tacked on a little extra summer every year by extending our vacation through the week after Labor Day.
It actually begain in 2002 with a family trip to the Outer Banks, but we went much later in the season that year, closer to October which was a little chilly and most everything was closed down already. In 2003, we chose the week of/after Labor Day because of its affordability and accessibility. That week and destination became our family tradition for the next eight years. This yearly pilgramage to Corolla and later Southern Shores included piling up bikes, dogs, beach towels and chairs, lots of food and wine and clamoring to fill a huge 6-bedroom house with laughter, board games, crafts, reading, movies and poker.
Each year, we would invite some part of our extended family; perhaps a couple of cousins, an aunt and uncle, and yes, of course good friends too, to join us in bocce ball, floating in heated swimming pools, night kite flying, late nights on the deck shooting targets and whatever invented family revelry my siblings concocted. The house seemed to magically expand to fit in everyone invited. In my mind, all these summers have blurred together into a kind of overall Labor Day stew, something that collectively becomes both family connectedness and celebration.
That was, until two summers ago, when my father was diagnosed with lung cancer. Suddenly, the beach house was filled with sadness and emptiness. Even before we had said goodbye to my father, we knew it would never be the same, that those carefree and relaxing times were behind us, and something new loomed. Last summer, we made it to Southern Shores for one last Labor Day week. My father was pretty ill by then, but he made it outside to play ladder ball with my brothers – I even played, which is unusual since my eye/hand coordination are lacking, but I wanted to enjoy that time with my dad. No one specifically acknowledged this would be our last trip with Dad, but I think we all worried that it would be so. And so it was.
No matter what, we wouldn’t have been together at the beach for Labor Day this year. My youngest brother became engaged over the Christmas Holidays and in the spirit of optimism, scheduled his wedding for Memorial Day Weekend at the Outer Banks. His fiancee had been with us for most of our beach weeks and both felt the draw of family tradition to marry there. The spirit of optimism that my father would be there to celebrate with them was strong and my father gave it the best fight of his life. Up until just a couple of days before he passed away, my father was still planning and organizing how to be in the front row, proud as could be of his son and new daughter-in-law.
Needless to say, my father did not make it back to the beach. He passed away four days before my brother was married. Up until the very end, we weren’t sure if the wedding would happen, it was a bittersweet time for our family as we felt the pain of my father’s absence as well as the happiness of welcoming a new member into the family. Even being in our beloved Outer Banks felt conflicted.
The time between Memorial Day and Labor Day are now a blur of painful emotions, extreme stress and yet, also blessful moments of laughter and comfort from family and friends. I contemplate this subdued Labor Day as a necessary part of saying goodbye to an annual tradition as well as a way of being a family and allowing new traditions and ways of experiencing my family to emerge. I am grateful for all the wonderful years and memories that were created and I expect that we will have many more to come, just different ones.
I will miss you.
Rest in Peace, Gabriel Eugene Maravetz, May 19, 1939 – May 25, 2011
I had a recent work incident that reminded me of an episode that happened while I was in college, working during the summer at a seafood restaurant in Ocean City, MD. I was a waitress, working at Phillips Crabhouse with 200+ other college students. The restaurant we worked at was very popular, with a line around the building most weekends during the summer. I am the first to admit that I wasn’t a very good waitress, I was unfamiliar with the art of fine dining and didn’t always make sure that appetizers arrived before the main course was served. Sometimes I forgot the drinks and even the bill could take me a good amount of time to get to. But I was very much aware of the quality of food, be it that the steamed food was hot, the rolls soft or the drinks icy. So when I realized I had delivered a burnt fried chicken children’s meal to my table, I was very concerned and returned to the kitchen to order a fresh plate. Because they served the waitstaff fried chicken as lunch and dinner at the restaurant, I can’t say I held the value of chicken in huge regard and so I casually threw out the burnt chicken as I returned to the cook line to order a new plate.
As I picked up the new dish, the cook asked me to return the burnt chicken to him, I guess concerned that I might steal a plate of food. I told him I had already thrown it out. He (in not a very nice way) told me I needed to get the chicken back to him. Each time he saw me come through the kitchen, he’d tell me he wanted that chicken. Finally, fully exasperated by his nagging, I dug the chicken out of the trash can, now buried under lots of other table rubbish. Without thinking of the consquences, fully engrossed in my own rage, I threw the chicken at the cook, and included a very colorful explicative about him and the chicken.
The next time I walked through the kitchen, my next ticket was refused, and the cook pointed at the chalkboard, that included my waitress name “Marva” under the label “86″ which in the restaurant world means “out of” or “no longer available”. Hence, my ability to deliver food to my tables was no longer possible, unless I was willing to walk a city block to the next kitchen, where hopefully, they hadn’t gotten word of the insult. (In today’s world of smartphones and text, I would have been shut down, no doubt!).
I finished the evening as best I could and went home fuming. But everytime I tried to enlist the sympathies of my friends and co-workers, they would shake their heads knowingly, and say ” I can’t believe you threw chicken at Ronnie…”. Being the stubborn person I am, for three days I refused to apologize, believing strongly that I was the offended party in this kitchen soap opera, what could be considered the original Hell’s Kitchen episode.
But the long treks across the city block restaurant to a kitchen that would serve me proved too much for me and I finally approached Ronnie with a white flag. I apologized for throwing the chicken at him and explained that I was very sorry for being disrespectful with my language. He was kind enough about accepting my apology and erased “Marva” from the 86 Board that day. At the end of dinner service, as I was making “lemons” (a nightly ritual where you picked through old lemons and cut new ones, leaving your fingers pickled) Ronnie came over with a lump crab sautee and offered it to me. This was about the hugest luxury you could enjoy at the seafood restaurant, and I recognized it for what it was, a peace offering. From that night on, I had my access to pretty much anything on the menu for my own enjoyment, and I had a personal protector, someone who had my back no matter what. So from anger and chaos, we built friendship and trust.
Fast forward to earlier this week. Without meaning to, with only the best intentions of doing the best for my customer, I have completely alienated a co-worker, someone who “cooks the food” so to speak, inside of my organization. We are still at the stage where if we had an 86 board at the office, my name would be on it. And so that brings me to tomorrow-Monday and the realization that I will need to make peace and extend the olive branch to this person. I can only hope that things will turn out as well as they did 25 years ago in Hell’s Kitchen.
February 26, 2011 was the First Annual Virtual Vitality Showcase, the brainchild of my dear friend Denise Starrett and the implementation-child of moi. At least the beginning of implementation, I have to give way more credit to Denise for her amazing follow through and enthusiasm to get VVS off the ground and it definately proved to be an amazing success. What began as an idea, spawned by a physical event that takes place in the UK, Denise was able to organize over 15 sessions, speakers and at least 200 attendees in a virtual conference that took skilled logistical planning and insane amounts of positive enthusiasm to deliver.
On Saturday, 2/26, Denise and I connected around 8ish and began an action-packed day from the comfort of our own living rooms: Denise in Virginia Beach, me here in Raleigh. We Tweeted, FaceBooked and hosted each hour-long session, greeting our guests as they came online, then introducing our guest speakers, keeping everyone up to date on last minute schedule changes and logistical challenges we were discovering in the moment. I was tucked up in my favorite comfy sweats, a huge glass of water, warm green tea and two phone lines that kept me linked up with the action. Denise and I communicated via the VVS dashboard and kept track of our attendees as they logged into their special sessions.
Suddenly it was my turn to present to our audience! I felt myself become instanly nervous and almost worried that I would forget my own presentation. Luckily a friend had signed up at the last minute, so knowing she was on the line, I focused delivering the very best message I could to her specifically. I took my own advice, and used my HeartMath tools to relax and becoming coherent. Feeling happy and relaxed, the hour flew by and I was done with a very inspirational and energizing day!
What would it be worth to you if you could dedicate one whole day to recharge your priorities?
Well, we have the event that’ll help you do just that – in the comfort of your own home!
Join us for the Virtual Vitality Showcase!
Saturday, February 26, 2011
9am – 6pm EST
Free 60-minute teleseminars led by specialists gifted at helping their clients build vitality in all areas of their lives.
Here is only a sample of what you can learn by treating yourself to a perfect day in:
· The Sure-Fire Formula for Increasing Your Energy, Naturally, in 30 Days
· 5 Steps to Clarity, Confidence and Direction in Your Career and Life
· Five Tips and Techniques to Increase Your Attraction Factor (whether you are single or in a relationship)
· The Top 5 Things All Women Must Know Before Getting Dressed
· And so much more!
Here’s the link to help you plan your day (in) and register for any or all these complimentary teleseminars.
P.S. Sure, you are busy and can easily skip this opportunity, but we know you are worth it to take a few hours to yourself, to renew, and to recharge your priorities. Go ahead stay in your PJ’s to do it! Reserve your spot here.
P.S.S. Feel free to invite friends and colleagues to the event, but please remember to reserve your spot in the teleseminars of your choice HERE first!
